Ah, it's so sad, the guy I fell for at work got sacked. And all because his bike ran out of petrol and he was a little late. Now, I'm not a boss and never have been, but it seemed a little harsh to dismiss someone on those grounds, saying that failing to check if your bike needs fuel, especially for a journey to work, is irresponsible. Surely we all make these mistakes?
Maybe, due to my sexual bias, I'm being a little too defensive?
I'm not only sad because I fancied him, but also because he seemed to be the only lively person in the workplace. And I know that isn't the bias talking because other staff members and regulars have said so. We got on really well, I felt comfortable around him and opened up to him in a way I've never done with work colleagues. In my main job, where I've worked for a year, I'm not nearly as close to my colleague due to my trust and self-esteem issues, which is a shame because they aren't bad people. It's just some people have a way of letting you feel comfortable around them I suppose.
I know this is the way with life, that people come and go and you never see them again, but it just seems so sad. It used to brighten up actually going to work, knowing that while you were there you could have a chat and a joke. I don't know if I will stay there any more, it just seems really boring and too regular. Workplaces always need a little life, as I know from my main job, the banter keeps you going. This is just a weird place, such a wide range of ages means nobody really connects I suppose.
But who knows? Apparently he's the only guy who knows how to do all the stuff round the bar there, as the owners are new to the trade, and have bought a pub as part of a business venture. So maybe with a few protests from the other staff, and the more diplomatic manner of the boss' wife, maybe? However, I don't think someone who phoned back their boss after getting fired to tell them to "Get f****d." would really be the sort to give in to grovelling.
But here's hopin' :-D
Maybe, due to my sexual bias, I'm being a little too defensive?
I'm not only sad because I fancied him, but also because he seemed to be the only lively person in the workplace. And I know that isn't the bias talking because other staff members and regulars have said so. We got on really well, I felt comfortable around him and opened up to him in a way I've never done with work colleagues. In my main job, where I've worked for a year, I'm not nearly as close to my colleague due to my trust and self-esteem issues, which is a shame because they aren't bad people. It's just some people have a way of letting you feel comfortable around them I suppose.
I know this is the way with life, that people come and go and you never see them again, but it just seems so sad. It used to brighten up actually going to work, knowing that while you were there you could have a chat and a joke. I don't know if I will stay there any more, it just seems really boring and too regular. Workplaces always need a little life, as I know from my main job, the banter keeps you going. This is just a weird place, such a wide range of ages means nobody really connects I suppose.
But who knows? Apparently he's the only guy who knows how to do all the stuff round the bar there, as the owners are new to the trade, and have bought a pub as part of a business venture. So maybe with a few protests from the other staff, and the more diplomatic manner of the boss' wife, maybe? However, I don't think someone who phoned back their boss after getting fired to tell them to "Get f****d." would really be the sort to give in to grovelling.
But here's hopin' :-D
***
Back to uni tomorrow, another ten weeks. Another ten weeks and my second year is over.
It seems weird, I still always feel a little dread, like you did going back to school after those eternal holidays as a kid. It's always more fun leaving school on the last day of term than it is going back again. Whilst the promise of new assignments and seeing your friends again is exciting, home is the place you feel truly comfortable I suppose. It is for me, having spent so long hating school and not really making any great friendships home was my world, and my parents and family were everything. Like the best families do, they accepted me for me, they supported me, and I never feared their opinions of me. Being thrown into an environment where you have to make non-familial relationships than are as strong as those with your family when you never even had real friends before remains daunting for me to this day. I'm desparately trying to shake off a little of my dependance on home, and trying to make my friendships seem as important and fulfilling, not just something that has to be done, so I'm prepared for proper adulthood. It's not them, it's me, my friends at uni, I'm sure would be only too happy to reciprocate any strong bonds I tried to develop. I've just got to overcome my lack of trust in anyone not blood-related. Easier said than done.
Here's hoping that this term does actually turn out to be the one where I really do achieve all the big things I want to, like I set out in a list in an earlier post. I have only one term before my last year of authentic youth and then it's all jobs and money, and no time to discover who I really am.
Here's hopin'!
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